I Live More Fully Because of You

The other night, Kristy and I were talking about ways that God is at work in our lives and areas of weakness that we still struggle with that come out, in particular, in the way we relate with one another. At one point, Kristy said something along the lines of, “How do you put up with me?” Without any hesitation, I replied, “I don’t put up with you. I live more fully because of you.”

Whereas that idea was kind of floating around, somewhat foggy in my mind as we discussed those things, it became so clear when it came out of my mouth. In our closest relationships, our flaws are brought to the surface and exposed. At that point, it’s our choice to lay those flaws at God’s feet and say, “HELP!” OR turn our heads and take the more comfortable route of denial, self-righteousness – and life less full (not to mention continued frustration in our closest relationships.)

Yet our awareness of and confrontation with our self-centered tendencies is ripe with opportunity for transformation. But only if we are willing to embrace humility and honesty with ourselves. What makes being faced with that self-centeredness all the more painful is that it is rarely a one-time event, even if we’ve resolutely decided that a particular expression of our selfishness or character weakness has to go. Such is the nature of spiritual transformation. Repetition. Review. Patience. And not just for ourselves, but for the person who is putting up with us – and learning to live more fully because of us.

So it wasn’t just a romantic one-liner that I was feeding to my beautiful new wife. I really do have opportunity to live more fully because of our relationship – and all the imperfections and character weaknesses that we both bring into it. I guess you could say that relational community with others is the nourishing soil of our spiritual transformation. Without it, we can’t know what it means to love God with all our heart, soul, and mind – and to let that love for God flow into our love for people.

Categories: transformation, life